Through the Eyes of a Gold Star Mom

A Heart Warmed by Classic Small Town USA

2011-06-04T23:47:00.000-07:00

In the small country town of Eagle Mountain, we settled in on the lawn of a small outdoor amphitheater for a Clint Black concert. It was the culmination of the week long Pony Express festivities. The large crowd was friendly and well mannered. An occasional police officer on horseback could be spotted on the hill overlooking the amphitheater.

Prior to the concert, numerous members of the community were acknowledged for their spirit of volunteerism and service to their community. A local children’s dance group performed for the cheering crowd. Recognition was given to a Marine who had lost his life while serving his country. This caught me by surprise, as it was my son Cpl. Adam Galvez this tiny community honored. I was deeply touched given the fact that we were guests of a soldier who spent more than 20 years in the Army and suffered multiple disabling injuries in while in Iraq. He and his wife are very much local heroes who have overcome extreme adversity and embraced life to the fullest. Our families joined by the tragedies of war, and a community grateful for their freedom.

We watched the concert under the stars and the spectacular fireworks display that followed. I was overwhelmed with how wonderful it felt to be among the people of this small town, enjoying the evening, the music, the fireworks, and the friendships. For me, it was one of those “Wow God” moments. Everything about the evening pointed to the beauty of God’s creation, His amazing love for us and the comfort of knowing that through the good times and bad, He never lets go of us.

American Legion Magazine, Unexpected Friends, By Amy Galvez May 2011

2011-05-03T13:56:00.000-07:00

Utah Gold Star Mother Amy Galvez talks with Iraqi women during a reception at the home of First Lady Hero Talabani. Photo by Cindy Hosea

My son, Adam, deployed to Iraq in 2006. I continued on with life’s daily tasks, but he was constantly on my mind. About five months later, I looked out my window and saw two Marines approaching my front door. Adam had been killed.

My story is not unlike that of thousands of other military mothers who have faced the unimaginable. Proud of our children, we occupy our time serving those who serve. We rally community support, send care packages and speak to local groups about the military. For many mothers, that doesn’t change even when our worst fears are realized. In a way, we feel as though we’ve been charged with carrying on our children’s work.

Last September, I was one of nine Gold Star Mothers – three from Utah, six from South Carolina – invited to Iraq by Families United Toward Universal Respect (FUTURE) and its Hugs for Healing program. For the first time, mothers of U.S. servicemembers would meet Iraqi women who have also suffered loss.

Each mother had a different reason for going to Iraq. Some hoped to find peace or feel closer to the child they lost there. Others wanted to better understand what their sons and daughters had fought for. As for me, I wanted to learn more about the Iraqi people and the country in which my son died.

Though we’d have an outstanding security team, Iraq was still a dangerous place.
Putting our families at ease about sending another loved one to Iraq wasn’t easy.
Based in Sulaymaniyah, in the Kurdistan region, we were in country for seven days. We were the Iraqis’ honored guests – the mothers of sons and daughters who had given so much for their nation. They told us stories about life under Saddam Hussein and in the years since. They shared their culture, their history, and their hopes for the future. We visited hospitals and women’s centers, and participated in service projects for women and children.

Having had an experience that profoundly changed our lives, many of our Gold Star mothers would probably go back to Iraq if given the chance. Mothers who’d lost children in Iraq now felt deeply connected to the country and its people.

Sept. 25, 2010: The pilot’s announcement – “We will be entering Iraqi airspace in three minutes” – was surreal. I was really going to Iraq. My emotions ran the gamut as I realized we would fly past the area in which my son died.

When we landed, a delegation of Iraqi women and other officials expedited us through customs and transported us to our hotel. Driving through the city, I saw many scenes that reminded me of my son’s war photos. Other areas looked progressive. Uncertain of what our accommodations would be like, we were pleasantly surprised to find modest, clean rooms with hot and cold running water and air conditioning.

In the hotel lobby we were introduced to the rest of our security team, which now consisted of two Americans and eight Iraqi men, in dark suits with sunglasses and earpieces. Feeling a bit nervous, we were escorted to the rear of the hotel, where several SUVs and police vehicles were staged. Our group, and the Iraqi women we would spend the week with, boarded two small buses, which followed the security vehicles with lights and sirens on.

In 10 minutes, we arrived at the headquarters of the Patriotic Union of Kurdistan (PUK), where a long procession of Iraqi women and dignitaries greeted each of us. They expressed deep appreciation for our visit as TV cameras rolled and hundreds of photos were snapped. Our unexpected VIP treatment continued at an elaborate luncheon of delicious traditional cuisine.

After the meal, I met an Iraqi woman who survived Saddam’s 1988 chemical-weapons attack. Her husband had been brutally killed by the regime. I was speechless as I listened to her story, and her expression of gratitude for my son’s sacrifice and the hard work of the U.S. military.

I’d been in Iraq not even three hours and already felt connected to people I’d known only from the evening news who lived half a world away. My eyes were being opened to the reality of the suffering of the Iraqi people and how much our military has done for them. I knew without a doubt that I was supposed to be here.

Sept. 26: Today we attended a Women’s Leadership Conference that included women from across Iraq, First Lady Hero Talabani, leaders from Women for FUTURE-Iraq, and Anfal widows of Saddam’s campaign against the Kurds. Joining us were Kurdish Regional Government officials, U.S. Army Gen. Thomas Vandal, Utah National Guardsmen, U.S. soldiers, State Department representatives and other dignitaries.

Much to my surprise, during Gen. Vandal’s address, he told my son’s story: “Twenty-one-year-old Marine Cpl. Adam Galvez was injured in a suicide bombing, buried alive under a collapsed building, attempted to rescue other Marines while taking gunfire from the enemy, and returned to duty only to be killed by an IED.” I was in awe that four years after Adam’s death, I sat in a conference in Iraq, where an Army general told his story to U.S. and Iraqi dignitaries and guests.

The Iraqi women talked about how they suffered under Saddam and were freed by the Americans from his torture and brutality.

“We grieve for your sons as if they were our own,” one woman said. “They are part of us, and now you are part of us.”

They spoke of the progress made by Iraqi women and their need to learn how to network in service and support of each another. This is not common among Iraqi women as it is in the United States. They are learning from our examples how to support and serve one another.

The languages spoken here are Arabic, Kurdish and English. There are plenty of people to serve as interpreters. With hugs and kisses to accompany the spoken words, there is little difficulty communicating with the Iraqi women.

Over dinner this evening, a woman told me that her father, four brothers and fiancé were executed. She said that when the government took their men and killed them, the women were not permitted to cry. If they were caught crying, they would be arrested for sympathizing with a traitor. She said her mother locked herself in a room of their house for three months following her father’s death so she could grieve without being caught. Like so many others, she thanked me for my son’s sacrifice for their freedom.

Sept. 27: Today the Iraqi and American women worked together to assemble hygiene kits, school supplies and newborn packages to be distributed at area hospitals, orphanages, schools and a women’s center. Some made quilts, others made beaded jewelry. We were able to show the benefits of working together for the betterment of the community.

At the cancer and maternity hospitals, we visited patients and distributed supplies. We found poor conditions, a lack of proper medication, basic medical supplies and comfort items. Many sick children were without blankets for warmth or to hold close for comfort. Saddened, we left wanting to do something to help.

Sept. 28: The city of Halabja is a 90-minute drive through the countryside on narrow roads, only a few miles from the Iran border. This is the site of Saddam’s 1988 chemical-weapons attack in which 5,000 people were killed within five minutes of the bombs dropping. Our vehicles moved through the tiny streets of this run-down town.

People stared as we passed by. Our arrival at the memorial site was somewhat unnerving. Unlike before, our security detail now carried submachine guns. News and video cameras were everywhere. Many people – nearly all carrying weapons – awaited our arrival. Our security briefed us on exactly how to move once we left the bus. We followed every order given, as we felt our safety was at risk.

The museum was filled with photos and displays of the dead lying in the streets following the attack 22 years ago. Photos were taken by Saddam’s men to prove the weapons had been effective. Copies lined the walls and in disbelief I looked at each one: a mother covering her child, and both laid dead in the street. The back of a pickup truck filled with dead children who’d tried to escape as bombs fell.

As I stared at that photo, a man pointed to himself, then pointed to the picture. He said, “Me.” Another man who spoke broken English confirmed what I believed the man to be saying. He had been one of the children in that truck, the only survivor. He laid in that truck for two days before being rescued, the other man said.

We visited the cemetery, where victims who could not be identified are buried in mass graves that contain hundreds of bodies. The rest are in single graves with headstones. Small fences and other makeshift borders surrounded multiple graves of people from the same family.

The Gold Star Mothers laid flowers at the base of a monument in the graveyard, and listened to survivors tell their stories and express their gratitude that our sons helped rid their country of the man who had done this to them. It was an emotional moment as survivors gave each mother a pin representing the 5,000 victims. I left realizing the importance of what our military had done for these people and the world.

Tonight we spent a special evening at the home of President and Mrs. Talabani. The first lady of Iraq hosted a dinner for the Gold Star Mothers visiting from the United States, along with the women from Baghdad with whom we had spent the week. The day before, Mrs. Talabani had traditional Kurdish dresses made for each woman in our group.

During dinner, she told stories of hiding out from Saddam Hussein in the hills of northern Iraq. One night, she heard the sounds of incoming fire and exploding bombs. The next morning, they found an unexploded bomb at the entrance of the building in which they had sought shelter. She also spoke of Saddam’s chemical-weapons attacks and the Kurds’ fight to stay alive.

Following dinner, Mrs. Talabani presented each Gold Star Mother with a crystal engraved with this message: “Our eternal gratitude to the mothers who raised the bravest of children, who dedicated their lives to the liberation of other nations ... A Mother.” I will cherish this forever as a gift from the heart of one mother to another.
The evening with Mrs. Talabani was uplifting and heartwarming. Her gratitude for us and our children who had died in her country, fighting for their liberation, was genuine.

Sept. 29: Today, the Peshmerga – Kurdish fighters – proudly hosted our delegation at their military base. Sheikh Jafar Mustafa, the Kurdish defense minister, spoke about the significance of the U.S. role in Iraq’s liberation and thanked us for our children’s sacrifice. The soldiers demonstrated their skills with marching drills, obstacle courses and other exercises, followed by lunch and time to visit with the U.S and Kurdish military.

Sept. 30: This afternoon was set aside for a time of quiet reflection and a memorial service for our sons and daughters who had been killed in Iraq. But was another memorial service really what we needed? I wanted to be accomplishing concrete work with the Iraqi people, not memorializing the dead, as so much of that had already been done. Little did I know this day may have been the most important of our week in Iraq.

At Lake Dukan, an exclusive resort in northern Iraq, our chaplain offered to serve communion for any who wanted to participate. Six of us moved to a secluded alcove for the service. Each one felt the presence of God in that place. We sang, worshiped and received communion. I thought of my son and his brutal death in this Muslim land, and now I was here, worshiping the Lord. What amazing things God has done to bring me to this moment. We looked up to see our friends – Iraqi women and others who had spent the week with us – gathered all around, watching us worship.

We ended the day in a large circle, and each mother took time to speak about her son, reflect, or share a Bible verse that was special to her. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to share with the Iraqis what God had done for me. To think that He would take a group of mothers whose children died in war in this country, then bring them to that land to share the love of Jesus, was almost more than I could comprehend. We concluded by singing “Amazing Grace,” with the Iraqi women attempting to join in.

There was a different “feel” as we left Lake Dukan. Our U.S. delegation, all in one bus, sang, laughed and danced in the aisle of the bus all the way back to town.
Our day at Lake Dukan was one that God had placed on the agenda, a divine appointment. He touched each one of us that day, in the most unlikely way, in the most unlikely place, and no one would ever be the same.

Amy Galvez and her husband, Tony, live in Salt Lake City. The story of their son, Marine Cpl. Adam Galvez, appeared in the May 2007 issue of The American Legion Magazine (“Death, Not in Vain”).

Gold Star Moms Prepare for Journey to Iraq

2010-12-10T20:43:00.000-08:00

The following eight posts tell the story of our Gold Star Mother's trip to Iraq

In my wildest imagination I never saw myself on the ground in Iraq, but that is indeed what is about to happen. With a little over a week to go, I and several other Gold Star Moms are frantically gathering our supplies and attending to the last minute details before we assemble at Salt Lake International Airport and begin our journey. We will join the other Gold Star Mothers and the staff of FUTURE who is hosting the trip, in Atlanta, and head off to the land where our sons served.

Our trip will include service projects to benefit Iraqi widows, orphans, hospital patients and the physically handicapped. We will be working with Utah based Operation Give to make and distribute aid kits, along with children’s educational and activity packs, as well as providing assistance to the Iraqi women in completing projects in their community.

Our travels will take us to the site of worst chemical attack in history. The 1988 chemical weapons attack by Saddam Hussein’s army killed 5,000 men, women and children. There, we will meet the town’s people and survivors of the gruesome attack. We’ll also spend time distributing supplies and activity packages in the community.

Cultural and social exchanges will be part of the week’s events as we get to know and understand the people our sons fought for.

As mother’s who’ve lost sons at war, we are uniquely privileged to have the opportunity to visit the nation our son’s gave so much for. As their moms, we count it an honor to do what we can for Iraq in light of all our sons did.

Follow our progress as we make final preparations and embark on this life changing journey. I have no doubt I will come back a different person, not only because of the experiences I will have and the people I will meet, but also because I will be in the country where my son spent the last days of his life. I'll have visited the land where a piece of my heart will remain forever.

Into Iraq

2010-12-09T14:37:00.000-08:00

Our journey began on Sept 23^rd as we assembled at Salt Lake International airport. Jan Moncur, Colleen Parkin and me Amy Galvez were going to Iraq, the nation in which our sons served and ultimately died. Carol Young was originally scheduled for the trip, but due to a lack of funding, was unable to go. Joining us was Salt Lake Tribune reporter Matthew LaPlante, whose job it was to chronicle the story of Utah Gold Star Moms in Iraq, on our humanitarian and healing mission to the Iraqi women. However Matthew, as it turned out would watch over “his Utah Moms” and attend to our concerns and needs, easing any apprehension we may have had.

We met up with the rest of our group in Atlanta. In all our group of eighteen consisted of three Gold Star Mothers from Utah, seven from South Carolina, a Chaplain, two staff from the Organizing group FUTURE (Families United Toward Universal Respect) and our security team. After a security briefing we were on our way to Paris, then Amman, Jordan, then finally on to city of Sulaymaniyah in northern Iraq.

The 36 hour trip was grueling but excitement remained high throughout our travels. When the pilot announced “we will be entering Iraqi airspace in three minutes” it was surreal. I was really going to Iraq. My emotions ran the gamut as I realized we would fly relatively close to the town in which my son died. I wondered what my son Adam would think. Who would have imagined that four years after his death I would be on the ground in the county where war took his life. I also considered the danger. But after getting my initial exposure to the middle east by spending several hours in Amman, Jodan, many of my fears were alleviated and I was ready to enter Iraq.

I was overwhelmed at touch down. We were really on the ground in Iraq. I was almost in disbelief that it was real. This is where my son spent the last days of his life, and now, I was there. Our group was met by a delegation of Iraqi women and other officials who expedited us through customs, and transported us to our hotel. Driving through the city I saw many scenes that reminded me of a hundreds of photos we had from my son’s time in Iraq. Other areas looked progressive. Development and progress was evident everywhere.

Uncertain of what our hotel accommodations would actually be like, we were pleasantly surprised to find a nice, somewhat clean room with hot and cold running water, a bathroom, comfortable beds and air conditioning.

Without a moment of rest, we assembled in the lobby waiting for our instructions, as none of us knew why our presence had been required. Our security team in whom we’d all gained confidence, announced our security would now be under the control of six Iraqi men in dark suits, sunglasses, and earpieces in their ears, resembling secret service or something similar, and we were to go with these men . I must admit, I was a bit nervous. They escorted us outside to the rear of the hotel where there were several SUV’s, and some police vehicles with doors open and a bustle of activity around them. Our group boarded two small busses which abruptly took off behind several SUV’s with the lead police vehicle with lights and sirens on. I finally realized we were part of a motorcade, but the moms did not know where we were going. After about a ten minute drive through town, we arrived at the headquarters of the Patriotic Union of Kurdistan. There we passed a long procession of Iraqi women and other dignitaries who greeting each one of us. We were ushered into a beautiful room with a large ringed oval table and plush green velvet chairs where we were seated. About forty people filled the room with many standing or sitting along the wall. We were addressed by the leader of the Patriotic Union of Kurdistan (PUK), and several Iraqi women. The expressed deep appreciation for our visit to Iraq, TV cameras shot video, and hundreds of photos were taken.

Our VIP treatment continued at the conclusion of the address as we then escorted to a feast. Enormous amounts of many varieties of Iraqi cuisine filled the table which was about thirty feet in length. The food was exceptional and truly was a feast.

After the meal I visited with an Iraqi women who brought me to tears as she thanked me for my son helping free them from Saddam Hussein. She had survived the 1988 chemical weapons attack by Saddam’s regime which killed 5,000 men, women and children. Then later her husband was brutally killed by the regime. This women personally suffered under Saddam Hussein and lost many family members under his dictatorship. I was speechless as listened to her story. Her gratitude for my son’s sacrifice and the hard work and sacrifices by the U.S. Military could not be adequately put into words.

I had been in Iraq for less than three hours and I was already changed in the most profound way. I had made a connection to people who existed a half a world away on the evening news. But they were real, and this was only the beginning of my eyes being opened to the reality of suffering of the Iraqi and how much our military has done for them. I already looked forward to what lay ahead later that day and in the coming week. This truly would be a life changing experience and I knew without a doubt that I was supposed to be here.

Women's Leadership Conference in Iraq

2010-12-07T00:11:00.000-08:00

It’s Sunday night here in Iraq, completing two days in country for the Gold Star Mothers. I’ll start by giving information on our conditions here in Iraq as several people have asked about it. Then I will share a few details of today’s events.

The temperature is in the high 90’s during the day and 80’s at night, so it is more comfortable than I was preparing for. Many places have air conditioning to some extent. Others however, do not. Today we attended a conference with hundreds of people and no working a/c. We got through it though! The elevators in our hotel work sporadically. Stepping into them is a risk. Our room is not actually on the seventh floor but we must walk up sevenflights of stairs to reach our room if we do not use the elevator. We have a heavy security presence.We often travel by motorcade with several security vehicles leading and bringing up the rear. We took time out before dinner tonight to do some shopping. A security detail was needed to take thirteen women shopping! We made them work hard on that outing as they not only had to track each one of us, but also assist in with our purchases helping us make the dollar/dinar conversion. Most of our women were prepared to not eat much on this trip either due to availability of food or concerns of getting sick from what we might eat. However, our organizers preselected the places we would eat as to reduce the risk of getting sick. The food in northern Iraq is outstanding and is offered in large quantities, often. The languages spoken here are Arabic, Kurdish and some English. Many of the Iraqis we are with speak enough English to communicate and there are plenty of people to serve as interpreters. Now on to today’s events.

Today we attended the Women’s Leadership Conference with women from various areas in Iraq, many of whom we’ve spent the last two days with. In attendance were leaders from Women for FUTURE Iraq, dignitaries, The First Lady of Iraq, U.S. Army Gen. Vandal, CW04 Holton from Utah and several U.S. Soldiers, State Dept representative and many others. Along with all the attendees, the auditorium was filled with security and news cameras.

Speeches were made by Mrs. Talabani, Gen. Vandal and many others. During Gen. Vandal’s address, much to my surprise, he told my son’s story. “21 year old Marine Cpl. Adam Galvez injured in a suicide bomb, buried alive under a collapsed building, attempting to rescue other Marines while taking gun fire from the enemy, and returning to duty only to be killed by an IED". As he expounded on the details he made clear the sacrifices that have been made by brave young Americans. I was in awe of the situation, that four years after Adam’s death in Iraq, I sat in a conference in Iraq where an Army general told his story to American and Iraqi dignitaries and Iraqi people trying to rebuild and secure their future.

The messages of the Iraqi women had a similar theme. They suffered greatly under Saddam Hussein and they were freed from his torture and brutality by the Americans. Words were not enough to express their gratitude of all that had been done for them. The traditional kisses, and hugs and tears spoke more than words could have. They were grateful for the bond the Gold Star Mothers now shared with them.

“We grieve for your sons as they were our own, because they are part of us and now and you are part of us”, one women said. They spoke of the progress being made by Iraqi women and the need to learn the American’s way of networking women together in service and support of one another. Women sharing and networking together is not common among Iraqi women as it is in the U.S. The women are learning from our examples and support, how to serve one another.

During Saddam Hussein’s regime, many women were widowed as their men were executed or simply vanished without a trace. Many of the women spoke of fathers, brothers, husbands of the same family being killed by Hussein or by insurgents, leaving huge numbers of women without men. If not widowed, there were no men to marry, leaving far too many women to survive on their own. It broke my heart, as over dinner a women told me of her father, four brothers and fiancé being executed. She said when the government took their men and killed them, the women were not permitted to cry. If they were caught crying, they would be arrested for sympathizing with a traitor. This woman’s mother locked herself in one room of their house for three months following her husband’s death so she could grieve without being caught. She again expressed her gratitude for all the U.S. Military has done for them and thanked me for my son’s sacrifice for their freedom.

In the past two days, I’ve seen the deeply compassionate and grateful hearts of women who have suffered and are now moving towards a brighter future. A bond has been formed and every Gold Star Mother in our group has been affected in the most profound way. We are blessed to be here with these remarkable women and look forward to spending the next few days with them.

Utah Gold Star Moms with

Mrs. Talabani, The First Lady of Iraq.

Halabjah

2010-12-06T22:35:00.000-08:00

The city of Halabjah is about a 90 minute drive from our location, through countryside on narrow roads, and only seven miles from the Iranian border. It is the site of Saddam Hussein’s 1988 chemical weapons bombing in which 5,000 people were killed within five minutes of the bombs dropping. Our vehicles moved through the tiny streets of this run down, poverty stricken town and was a spectacle in which people stopped and stared as we passed by. Our arrival at the memorial site was somewhat unnerving. Unlike any time before, our security detail now carried submachine guns. News and video cameras were everywhere. Many people, mostly men in suits, were awaiting our arrival. Our security briefed us on exactly how to move once we left the bus. We followed every order that was given as we felt our safety was at risk.

The museum was filled with photos and displays of the dead lying in the streets following the attack of twenty two years ago. Men, women, children, babies, the elderly, animals all lay dead. Photos of the dead were taken by Saddam’s men to prove the weapons had been effective. Copies of those photos lined the walls and were heartbreaking. Mother and baby lying dead in the street as she tried to shield her baby from death. The back of a pick up truck filled with children trying to escape the planes dropping the bombs. They did not escaped. As I was looking at this photo, a man standing in front of me pointed to himself, then pointed to the picture. He said, “me”. Another man who spoke broken English confirmed what I believed the man to be saying. The man standing before me had been one of the children in that truck, the only survivor. “He laid in that truck for two days” the man said until he was rescued by Iranians. As I moved on, a video showed a young boy who survived the attack but was covered in blisters. As I watched, a man standing beside me looked at me, pointed to himself then pointed back to the video. This man was the child in the video. Others stood at the memorial where a listing of names of the dead showed several names from a single family all grouped together. One man pointed to a group of ten names, all those of his family. He had been the only survivor.

We moved to the graveyard where the victims for the chemical bombings were buried. Those who were not identified were buried in mass graves which contained 1,500 bodies or more. The rest were buried in a single grave with a headstone. Little fences and various kinds of bordering denoted multiple graves of people from the same family. The Gold Star Mothers laid flowers at the base of the “Mother’s Monument” in the graveyard, and listened to the survivors tell their stories and express their gratitude that our sons helped rid their county of the man who had done this to them. The sincere connection they seemed to feel with us touched our hearts. With most of us in tears, one by one, a pin representing the monument and tribute to 5,000 killed was pinned on us by the survivors.

Still aware of the presence of heavy fire power, video taping, and obvious potential safety risk, at the conclusion of the ceremony, our group of Gold Star Moms, Iraqi moms, and others quickly moved as instructed by security, back to our bus.

How do you sort out all the emotions after what we had just experienced? 5,000 dead in the streets, the photos, the graves, the survivors and the overwhelming realization that our U.S. Military got rid of the man who had done this. All the Gold Star Mothers felt pride in knowing our children helped liberate these people and give them hope for the future.

An Evening with The First Lady of Iraq

2010-12-05T07:41:00.000-08:00

One special evening during our trip to Iraq was spent at the home of President and Mrs. Talabani. Mrs. Talabani, the First Lady of Iraq, hosted a dinner for the Gold Star Mothers who were visiting from the U.S., along with the women from Baghdad that we spent the week with. The day before, Mrs. Talabani had Tradition Kurdish dresses made of each woman in our group. The men were also provided with traditional Kurdish clothing. Dressed for the occasion, we arrived at the home of Mrs. Talabani. The First Lady of Iraq provided a bountiful dinner for our group. During dinner Mrs. Talabani told stories of hiding out from Saddam Hussein in the hills of Northern Iraq. She recounted the events of one night in particular when she heard the sound of incoming fire and exploding bombs while remaining in black out conditions. The next morning they found and unexploded bomb in the entrance of the structure they had sought shelter in. She also spoke of the chemical bombings by Saddam’s men on the Kurds and the fight to stay alive as he inflicted death and destruction the people. Mrs. Talabani’s genuine gratitude for all the U.S. Military had done for her country could not be overstated.

Following dinner, Mrs. Talabani presented each Gold Star Mother with and elegant crystal award engraved with this beautiful message. “Our eternal gratitude to the mothers who raised the bravest of children, who dedicated their lives to the liberation of other nations…… (signed) A Mother” This is something I will cherish forever as it is from the heart of one mother to another.

A time of socializing with Mrs. Talabani and the Iraqi women in our group we now considered dear friends was had, along with a surprise birthday celebration for our Utah Gold Star Mom Colleen Parkin. Mrs. Talabani provided four pink birthday cakes (pink being Colleen’s trademark color) and the group sang Happy Birthday to Colleen in English, Kurdish and Arabic.

This evening with Mrs. Talabani was uplifting and heartwarming. Her love and gratitude for us and our children who had died in her country, fighting for their liberation, was sincere and genuine. She was a mother reaching out to the hearts other mothers.

The repeated theme of the week which for me was completely unexpected, was love and gratitude for all our sons and daughters had done for the people of Iraq. They them as their own, and now the mother’s of those remarkable American Warriors were also loved by the people of Iraq.

Mrs. Talabani with the Joan Betros the President of FUTURE

Mrs. Talabani presenting a gift to
South Carolina Gold Star Mother Ann Hampton

Mrs. Talabani and Utah Gold Star Mother
Colleen Parkin at the birthday celebration

Birthday Party!

Utah group Amy Galvez, Colleen Parkin, Jan Moncur

and Matthew LaPlante

Things Were Not as They Seemed.

2010-12-04T16:13:00.000-08:00

Although we felt fairly safe in Iraq, there were some tense moments on this trip. Life in Iraq is very different than what we are used to in the U.S. Machine guns are a common sight and go mostly unnoticed by the locals. The sound of gunshots are heard from time to time. Buildings riddled with bullet holes are seen here and there and the periodic sound of a distant explosion doesn’t seem to startle anyone but visitors.

Upon arriving in Iraq we were told by our security to stay highly aware of our surrounds, always stay with our assigned partner, and listen to our security detail and do exactly as they say. Doug the head of our security team emphasized the importance of paying attention to our "gut". If something didn’t feel right, it's probably for good reason. Our security was always on top of things and we had complete confidence in their ability to keep us safe.

One evening, those feelings of safety gave way to apprehension, concern, and finally fear. We boarded our buses and set out for dinner. No one in our group, including our security was aware of what was in store for us that evening . We arrived at a heavily guarded compound and were welcomed in high style. Video cameras captured our every move, but we had become somewhat accustomed to that as cameras seemed to be present everywhere we went. During the reception it came to light that things were not as they seemed. Although dinner was uneventful, there was a growing sense that something wasn't right. The enormous presence of firepower and guards at the compound was concerning because our security did not have any visible weapons and were completely outnumbered. We were feeling increasingly uncomfortable.

Following dinner we were escorted to an area of the compound where a religious ritual was to take place. It was a ritual of violence inflicted on adults and children. Violent acts were committed right in front of us as others recorded our reactions on video. We were helpless to do anything but sit there and watch. What if we had the “wrong” reaction? What if we tried to leave? What if we tried to stop them from hurting one of the kids? None of us was willing to risk making the wrong move. Many of us prayed quietly as the mutilations continued. After nearly two hours of being subjected to watching this “ritual”, it became clearer as to why we were there.Their purpose for having us there was to show us what violent and terrible things can be done, yet their god Allah will protect them. They actually seemed to be proud and showing off in a very disturbing way.

After a very long evening we were permitted to leave. We were shocked by what we saw that night. Part of what seemed so sad was the children being brought up in this violence and conditioned for these types of rituals. In Iraq there is no “child protective services” to swoop in and remove children from a dangerous environment.

The events of the that night gave way to an unexpected and joyful day that would continue to bond the women together. The love of the God of the Bible would be evident in sharp contrast to the violence of Allah, the god of Islam.

A Divine Appointment at Lake Dukan

2010-12-03T18:30:00.000-08:00

One afternoon was set aside for time of quiet reflection and a memorial service for our sons and daughters who had been killed in the Iraq war. Was another memorial service really what we needed? I wanted to be accomplishing concrete work with the Iraqi people, not memorializing my son, as much of that had already been done. Little did I know this day may have been the most important day of our time in Iraq.

We arrived at Lake Dukan, an exclusive resort in northern Iraq. Overlooking the lake and the nearby hills, the mothers had a nice lunch and a quite time of visiting with one another and reflecting on our children and all that had happened.

Our Chaplain offered to provide communion for any who would like to participate. A group of six moved to a secluded alcove to proceed with our service. Each one felt the presence of God fall on us in that place. We sang, worshiped the Lord and received communion. The moment was surreal as I thought of my son and his brutal death in this Muslim land, and now I was here, worshiping the Lord. From August of 2006 to September of 2010, what amazing things God had done, to bring us to this moment. As we concluded our worship and communion service we looked up to see our Iraqi friends (Iraqi women and others we had spent the week with) gathered all around, watching us worship of our Lord.

We ended our day with our Moms, Iraqi friends and others gathered outside in a large circle. Each mother was given time to speak about her son, reflect, or give a bible verse that was special to them. Each mother took a few moments. This was a once in a lifetime opportunity to share with the Iraqis, what God had done for me. I took my place in front of the group and shared about the Lord, His love and all He has done. Again, a moment that was unfathomable four years ago. To think God would take a group of mothers whose children died in war in this country, and bring them to that land to share about the love of Jesus. It was almost more than I could fully comprehend. In the deaths of our children, God continues to fulfill his purpose.

We concluded by singing Amazing Grace. God was present with us in that gathering, His presence fell on us there. The bond and love between the Iraqi women and our moms, and the display of worship of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, was a moment no one could have imagined.

There was a different “feel” as we left Lake Dukan. Our American delegation all in one bus, sang, laughed and danced (yes danced in the aisle of the bus) all the way back to town.

Our day at Lake Dukan was one that God had placed on the agenda, a divine appointment. God touched each one of us that day, in the most unlikely way, in the most unlikely place, and no one would ever be the same.

South Carolina Mom Sheila shares her
thoughts with the group

Amy and Sheila after the
communion service

South Carolina Moms Jane, Emily
and Utah Mom, Amy at Lake Dukan

Our Week in Iraq, an Overview

2010-12-02T05:24:00.000-08:00

When we went to Iraq, The Gold Star Mothers were unsure of what to expect.We were told we would do service projects, work one on one with the people, unite women from the U.S. with Iraqi women, help the orphans and widows, and teach about service and volunteerism. A pretty tall order and all of it undefined. My hope was to quietly get into the country and do something that was meaningful for the people, and get out. My idea was to “blend in” as much as possible as to not alert too many people of our presence. We did anything but blend in. We were big news in Iraq, with high level and high profile events the entire week. TV cameras awaited us everywhere we went.There was a groundswell of excitement over our visit and genuine love and gratitude for our son’s sacrifice in their country. We were honored guests in Iraq.

Our visit centered around the Kurdish city of Suliamaniyh in the north. The Kurds were heavily persecuted by Saddam Hussein and they are especially grateful for all the American’s have done for them. The area is considered quite safe as compared to other parts of Iraq. Little in the way of insurgent attacks take place there. However we were given a large security detail, a few with our group and the others were local Iraqi security agents and all were outstanding.

Kurdish, Sunni and Shia women from various parts of Iraq joined us and spent most of the week with us. Over the week, we grew close to these women for we shared a common bond. Whether through the brutal regime of Saddam Hussein or from the insurgent attacks that followed, these women had lost loved ones. Many women shared stories in which as many as eight men from their family, brothers, fathers, children, husbands had been killed or simply vanished, never to be heard from again. Because these situations are not all that uncommon in Iraq, very large numbers of women have been left without men, and must provide for their families on their own. Boys taken by the regime, left a population of girls growing up who would have no one to marry as the female population was much larger than the male population.

The goal of Families United Toward Universal Respect (FUTURE) who hosted the trip, is to empower women in Iraq by teaching self reliance, networking with other women, and volunteerism by bringing women from the United States and Iraq together who have suffered similar loss and share a common goal.While working with the women throughout the week, we attended conferences where women who were widowed and knew loss, told their stories and expressed their deep gratitude for the sacrifice our children had made in their country, for them. Repeatedly our fallen sons were referred to as their martyrs. They considered our sons as their own and tried to convey their deep love for these young men and women who were willing to sacrifice so much to liberate their people. The bond formed between the Gold Star Mothers and the Iraqi women was deep, strong and lasting. As mothers whose children died in their land helping free and stabilize their nation, our common goal was the success of their nation and their people. Our sons did all they could do, now mothers working with mothers to help strengthen their communities, was the next logical step.

Together we spent time in the cancer hospital visiting with children in treatment. Cancer rates high due to chemicals that were used by Saddam Hussein to attack the people. Some time was spent determining the medical needs, and ways both American and Iraqi women could help the hospital and the people in need. A visit to the maternity hospital revealed significant needs of common medications that could save the lives of premature babies. Iraqis do not pay for their medical services as it is all provided by the government, and sadly many basic needs are lacking. Infant kits and baby blankets were distributed at this stop. The Women’s Center, a place where women can go for counseling, family planning, legal services, shelter or whatever needs or crisis they are facing, was our next stop. While women in Iraq face some needs similar to American women in crisis, they face many other issues that thankfully American women will never deal with. We left supplies that had been gathered in the U.S. for the Iraqi women and came away with specific needs the center has and ways American women can help.

Halabjah. Is the site of Saddam Hussein’s 1988 chemical weapons bombing in which 5,000 people were killed in five minutes. Although I’d seen pictures and knew of the attack, it was overwhelming to be in the exact place where it all happened. We saw horrific pictures of men, women and children lying dead in the streets. We visited the graveyard where the victims are buried, saw the mass graves, and the families sections in which several members of a single family were buried. We also had the chance to meet a few people who had survived the attack. Again, deep love and appreciation was showed to our Gold Star Moms not only for coming, but for the sacrifices made by our children to rid them of the man who had perpetrated this evil upon them.

Many in America still debate the need for the U.S. going into Iraq in 2003.Standing in the place, and seeing the documentation of the horror inflicted on humanity, I believe the world is a safer place because of the efforts of the U.S. Military and a government willing to do what needed done.

As we left Iraq we were relieved as there were a few times our safety was in question. But we came away with a new understanding for the country, the culture and the people who had benefited from the U.S. presence in Iraq and more specifically, our son’s sacrifice. As mother’s of sons who had died in this land, we would now carry on by helping the people strengthen their communities and ultimately, their nation.

George W. Bush Back in Salt Lake

2010-11-20T10:55:00.000-08:00

Former President George W. Bush came to Salt Lake City yesterday on his book signing tour. Well over a thousand people lined up to get a signed copy of the book and meet the former president. Some even camped out overnight as to ensure entrance to the 1:00 – 3:00pm book signing at a local Costco store. The line wrapped around the building, but no one seemed to mind the long wait.

As people came out of the store with their autographed copy of the just released book, many were beaming with excitement over their encounter with President Bush. His down to earth personality, wittiness, and ability to connect with everyday people endeared him to their hearts. Even in a brief encounter, one is able to see the sincerity of this man.

A group of about six protesters held their position across the parking lot. One protester held a sign stating Bush killed more people in Iraq than Saddam Hussein did. Being the mother of Marine killed in Iraq, and having just returned from Iraq myself, I nearly had to be restrained. I wanted to jump into the middle of that group of protesters and put them in their place. Having heard first hand accounts of the evil and brutality of Saddam Hussein, the executions, and his barbaric savagery from the people that lived under his reign, I could hardly contain myself. I recalled conversation with Iraqis about Al Qaeda training camps there how Saddam had worked so closely with them. My visit to the city where thousands were gassed by Saddam Hussein’s men, and having stood before mass graves which contained the remains of hundreds of people he had killed, was still fresh in my mind. And somehow Bush is the bad guy.

Rocky Anderson mayor of Salt Lake City from 2000 – 2008 once again held an anti-Bush rally. This time his defiant crowd numbered less than twenty people. Anderson never passed up an opportunity to protest President Bush and even had the audacity to lead an anti-Bush/anti-war protest in his official capacity as mayor, as my son’s funeral was underway in August of 2006.

The decency of George W. Bush, his integrity, depth of character and his ability to lead in tough times, is what I will always admire and respect about him. One on one time President Bush spent with our family the day after we buried our son, revealed a sincere and courageous man, and one who had been able to make the difficult decisions, knowing the consequences those decisions would have on families like mine. As a father himself, he clearly recognized our pain and reached out to love and comfort us.

I miss George Bush the man and George Bush the president. He was the right man at the right time in history. Thank you President Bush, for having the courage and integrity to lead our nation. It was nice to have you back in Salt Lake City.

It's My Turn to Make Adam Proud

2010-07-18T20:52:00.000-07:00

My son went to Iraq to defend our liberty and help free and stabilize a nation. About five months into his deployment two Marines were at my door telling me my son had been killed by an IED. Four years later it would be my turn to “serve”.

I, and three other Utah Gold Star Moms (mothers whose sons died in military service during war time), will go on a “humanitarian and healing mission” to Northern Iraq in late September. We will join other Gold Star Moms from South Carolina through the organization FUTURE. Our sons helped free and stabilize a nation, now its our turn to reach out to families, and specifically the women of Iraq who, like us are mothers, and like us have lost loved ones.

Our mission is to connect with the women, families, and orphans in the region. We will work side by side with Iraqi women and participate in service projects to impact the lives of those our sons gave so much for. But to me, it means so much more.

Three weeks before my son Adam was killed in Iraq, he was injured in an attack that killed four other Marines. While recovering from his injuries we spent many hours on the phone together. In one conversation he said “Mom, there’s a reason I’m alive. I should have died too”. Because my husband Tony and I always had a feeing that there was something different about Adam, and that he would someday accomplish something “big”, I agreed with him and said “yes, God has a special purpose for your life”. In following conversations we always spoke of his “special purpose” and each time I reminded Adam to pray about what God had for him to do, and he agreed. A few short weeks later, Adam was dead.

As a Marine Officer stood in my living room and read the “casualty report” my thoughts went to Adam’s special purpose. In my mind I said “Lord, what about his special purpose?” Despite the devastation I was facing I knew God had a plan and He was working in the situation.

As the years have unfolded I have seen God’s plan at work in my life and in the lives of others. I am not the same person I was four years ago. The heartbreaking news of my son’s death threw me into the arms of God and not away from Him. I now have opportunities to share the love of Christ everywhere I go, when before that was not the case. We’ve seen God move in the lives of other people because of Adam’s life and death. Even in death Adam was reaching people.

Because I pray to stay in God’s will and in the plan He has for my life, I look at opportunities that arise as a chance to walk in God’s plan. Being one of a few Gold Star Moms invited to go to the country where my son died and reach out to the people there, made me seriously think about what God was doing. Could it be in His plan for me to go to Iraq? Could it be part of Adam’s special purpose? What would God’s purpose be for sending me there as opposed to someone else? I don’t know the answers to those questions. However, after months of prayer I decided to walk through the doors God has opened. I feel inadequate to be an ambassador for Him. I’m nothing without Him. But because Christ lives in me, where I go, He goes, and that's good enough for me. Proverbs 16:9 tells us that we can plan our own course, but the Lord determines our steps. I’m looking forward to fulfilling an opportunity that God has placed before me. I’m grateful that He is in charge and that He will direct my steps.

I ask that you would pray for God’s purpose to be fulfilled in this trip, and that you would keep each of the four Gold Star Moms in prayer as we take this journey. I know this trip will open a wellspring of emotions for me as I visit the country where Adam spent the last days of his life. I knew how much Adam wanted to make his parents proud, now it’s my turn to make Adam proud.

Read more about this journey at www.utahmomsiniraq.org
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Complacency Kills

2010-06-23T16:14:00.000-07:00

I’ve never felt as hopeless about the future of our nation and our freedom as I feel today. With a congress and a president treating our constitution as an inconvenience, and their daily assault on the American way of life, I wonder what will be left to salvage in 2012.

I am a proud American, but I don’t think our president is. In fact, I believe President Obama has outright disdain for this nation and all it stands for. He apologizes for America, assaults capitalism, stifles economic growth, spends enormous amount of our money, bombards us with new regulations, imposes massive government control, hampers the war effort, refuses to deal with serious national security threats while diminishing our support for Israel, and the list goes on and on.

But the most telling action taken by President Obama was in the aftermath of the gulf oil spill, when he placed a six month moratorium on deep water drilling, seemingly without regard to the thousands upon thousands of jobs that would be lost and lives that would be ruined. Nor did he seem to be concerned with the economic chaos that would ensue because of his action. If an airliner crashes do we halt all air travel? How does this even make sense?

I believe that President Obama will stop at almost nothing to ram through his agenda to change America, economically, socially and globally. This sadly seems to extend to the war on terrorism. Many would argue, and I would agree, that President Obama’s objective in the war in Afghanistan is not victory. His delay in approving a request for more troops in Afghanistan last year underscored his lack of commitment to the war, victory, and the safety of our troops. Today’s ousting of General McChrystal looked more like a temper tantrum rather than a decision made in the best interest of America.

Jumping on my soap box for a minute, if we are not in Afghanistan to win, then bring the troops home and deal with the fallout later, and most likely on our homeland. Otherwise, let them do the job and come home victorious. Fighting a “nice war” doesn’t work, it only gets our troops killed and empowers the enemy. I think the change of command in Afghanistan today has only furthered the perception of a weakening America.

I’m an average American wife, mom and working woman. Having buried a son who was brutally killed on the battlefield serving this nation and preserving our freedom, I have to speak up. For the cost to our son and our family was too high to sit idly by and watch this country be dismantled one day at a time. While I’m still free to express my opinion, I’ll do it. I don’t have to justify my beliefs and you don’t have to like them, but I am free to express them, at least for now. I also believe that if the Obama Administration goes unchecked, we will soon see the day when people with opinions like mine will be silenced .

Outside of God and His hand of protection on America, this is how I see things. But God has blessed America, for our nation was founded on Him. Prayer changes things and we must be praying for our nation and our leaders. We must be involved and do all we can to preserve this nation and what it stands for, because it is under assault. Complacency kills. That’s a term I learned from my son. If we don’t heed that warnings and remain diligent, we will suffer the consequences.

It's Okay to Cry

2010-05-06T21:05:00.001-07:00

I’ve seen a lot of Facebook postings from Gold Star Moms lately indicating that I am not the only one having a difficult time right now. For some it’s the anniversary date of their child’s death, for others it’s the fact that Mother’s Day is just around the corner. Maybe it’s for no reason at all. Whatever the cause, a lot of us moms seem to have heavy hearts right now.

The thing is, losing a child, although an adult, is not something you ever “get over”, no matter how much time passes. You progress and move forward, but the loss is part of every minute of every day. You just learn how to deal with it and accept it as “normal”. On this journey, the Lord has blessed me and provided me with the most incredible support network. I know I never have to carry this burden alone.But for some reason right now, I want to carry it. For some reason I want to feel the pain, the loss, and the grief.

My son was killed in a massive fiery explosion. If I could fully comprehend what really happened to him, I don’t think I could survive. God loves us so much that He protects us, takes the pain for us, and surrounds us with others to help carry the heavy load. I have relied on that; God’s love, His blessings, His people. I have been able to focus on the good that came, and continues to come from something so horrible. But right now I don’t want to be strong. I want to cry and I want to feel the pain.

In experiencing these feelings, I felt as though I was letting God and people down. After all He has done in our life and the lives of others, choosing to take the pain seems like an insult in light of all God has done. I also have a “reputation” to uphold. I have been strong and I’ve given the Lord the credit for the strength I have. But right now I just don’t want to be strong. But giving into grief makes me feel guilty.

Last night I had a brief visit with a friend who had no idea how I was feeling. During our conversation, she suddenly turned and looked directly into my eyes, took ahold of my arm and said “it’s okay to cry”. She went on to remind me that Jesus wept, and that the bible doesn’t say we shouldn’t cry when we are sad. It was as though through my friend, God gave me permission to indulge in my pain for a while. It’s okay that I don’t always feel strong and it’s okay to grieve the loss of my precious son.

So for now I’m spending a lot of time at the cemetery, hanging out there, reading, studying, crying, or taking afternoon naps on my son’s grave, or doing whatever makes me feel the emotions I need to feel right now. After a time, I will hand it all back to God for the load would be too much to bear if I kept it for very long.

I’m grateful that a friend with no knowledge of my turmoil, helped me understand that God knew my struggles. He cared enough to make sure I knew it’s okay to be sad and it’s okay to cry.

TEXAS ROAD TRIP 2010

2010-04-08T16:04:00.000-07:00

THE ADVENTURE BEGINS,
Part 1

Is it a “dream trip come true” or am I still trying to cope with the death of my son Adam in Iraq, and put all the pieces of the story in place? Either way, I’m going to have a blast on “Texas Road Trip 2010”!

When my son Adam joined the Marines and was assigned to 3^rd Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion (LAR). I sought support by hooking up with other 3^rd LAR moms in an online Yahoo group just for family members of 3^rd LAR Marines. A bond formed between the mothers and we became good “friends” although only through the internet. We frequently had evening online group chats, where we of course discussed our sons, along with many other things. We got to “know” one another, and our friendships grew. When our son’s deployed to Iraq in March of 2006, our interaction with one another intensified. We had nightly online group chats and stopped for prayer at 8:00 PM every night. Different moms would lead in prayer – typing a prayer for each of us to read. It was as though we were talking to each other and all praying together. Our online group became a lifeline of sorts.

When news came of my son’s death in Iraq, my “friends” were there for me. They went through Adam’s death with me. The network of support formed through a Yahoo group, helped sustain me in those terribly difficult days. Now years later, we are still friends, although most of us have never met in person.

The moms lived in various places throughout the country, me in Utah, many in the mid-west , with others on the coasts, and several in Texas. It’s been my dream for a while now to meet some of the moms with whom I’ve formed such a deep bond.

Our life was defined by the death of our son. Everything changed and the world shifted for us. Our lives are now filled with the most wonderful people because of Adam; people that came into our lives through the Marine Corps or as a result of Adam’s death. Each one is a special blessing. Texas Road Trip 2010 will take me on a thousand mile journey to meet or once again connect with some of those wonderful people.

The journey begins Friday April 9^th when I arrive in Dallas/Ft. Worth where the road trip will begin. Over the next 10 days I will post “adventure updates”. I’ll share the blessings and stories that unfold along the way. I miss my son more than words could ever express, but in his absence God has blessed us in the most amazing ways. The blessings continue and the journey begins.

ADVENTURE UPDATE,
Part 2

“Lost in Dallas!” That’s was my big Texas welcome! Within five minutes of leaving the airport I was desperately lost in Dallas rush hour traffic, trying to recall all the good reasons for making this trip. At that moment I could think of none. Eventually I reached my first destination, the home of the Hubbard’s. They are a special family who came into my life when Chad, a Marine Officer deployed in Iraq, decided to reach out to a mom who had lost her Marine son. Having no prior connection to our family or to Adam, Chad took it upon himself to make sure that in the loss of my son, I would still have a Marine to watch over me. The Hubbard Family has become very special to me and I am grateful for the blessings God continues to provide, through the people He places in my life.

With Chris Tomlin concert tickets in hand, we “flew” across town, probably breaking land speed records. The concert was an awesome time of praise and worship, and something I had been longing for. In fact, I so longed for that kind of worship, that I bought the concert tickets before I planned the trip to Texas. There was either some faith at work there, or a whole lot of something else, I'm not sure which. Regardless, the concert was all I expected! The following morning the road trip began. 150 miles southeast to Palestine to see The Bailey’s.

During Adam’s time with 3^rd LAR, Millye Bailey’s son Patrick was Navy Corpsman with 2^ndLAR. Milley and I became acquainted when her mother’s group so kindly allowed me to join them when their son’s went to Iraq to replace 3^rd LAR as they returned home. Still needing to be connected and wanting to know what was happening in the city where my son died, Millye became my online friend along with several other 2^nd LAR moms. I found their acceptance of me to be loving yet sacrificial, since I felt I represented their worst nightmare. My son had been brutally killed in the very place their sons now were. Yet they loved me and reached out to me in ways I never expected.

The trip to Millye’s house in Palestine led me through gorgeous Texas countryside with an abundance of trees, wildflowers, green rolling hills and lots of cows. Arriving at the Bailey’s, I was welcomed like long lost family. The bond first formed in an online group was a bond that would never be broken. We talked for hours about everything. Patrick told lots of “Iraq stories”, which were interesting and informative, but also filled in a few more of the “puzzle pieces” for me, as I continue to try to fully understand what happened to Adam. The time spent with this warm and loving family blessed and enriched my life in ways I cannot put into words.

I had to force myself to leave the Bailey’s after two wonderful days there, as I would have been content to plant myself there for sometime. Not only because of the friendship, but also for the outdoor beauty, the warm breeze, singing birds, the wind rustling though the trees and beautiful sights of the area.

I made the 270 mile drive southwest to San Antonio. There I met with the Marine who was injured in the blast that killed my son. We had met before. It was good to see him again and see how much he had progressed. He proudly showed off the new Marine “hang out” at Ft. Sam Houston, for Marines recovering from injuries. Donations from caring Americans have provided a great place with lots of “high tech toys” for the Marines to relax and have fun as their healing process continues.

Navigation challenges aside, the trip so far had been nothing short a wonderful. More adventures and heartwarming moments were ahead as I continued on with "Texas Road Trip 2010". Next stop, Victoria

THE ADVENTURE CONCLUDES,
Part 3

Another GPS mishap while trying to leave San Antonio! This time I knew better and opted to find my own way 110 miles southeast to the town of Victoria. There, I arrived at the home of Retired Army Colonel Michael Petrash. Our paths first crossed on August 31, 2006 one day after Adam’s funeral. We had been invited to hear President Bush address the American Legion Convention in Salt Lake City. Having just buried our son the day before, we were still in a bit of a fog. While waiting for the President’s speech to begin, a kind and compassionate Army Officer took the empty seat next to us. Unbeknownst to us, it was somewhat of a “set up”. Fellow Soldiers summonsed Col. Petrash from across the room as asked him to sit next to us, and quietly informed him we had just buried our Marine son. “Sir, we thought you’d be just the right person to sit with the Galvez Family”, the Soldiers told him. Having lost his adult daughter six years prior in a car accident, Michael knew the pain we were suffering and indeed was just the right person to sit with us. It was as though he was sent by God. His kindness, compassion and spiritual encouragement meant so much on that very difficult day. We visited on occasion while Michael remained in Utah, but since his return to Texas over three years ago, we’d had little contact. Reconnecting with the Petrash’s was like a family reunion.

Deep in the planning process of Warrior's Weekend, Michael and his family, the lead organizers of the project and I met for dinner. What amazing people, managing over 100 volunteers to provide a fishing weekend at Port O’Connor, Texas for those who had suffered devastating injuries in the service of our nation. Three hundred Soldiers plus families members were expected there in a little over a month and these fine people were making it all happen. I am constantly amazed by the people who continue to care so much, and are willing to move heaven and earth to do something meaningful for our servicemen and women. I am honored to know such kind and Godly people. My time with the Petrash’s and the special people in their community was heartwarming and uplifting, and over much too soon.

Day six of Texas Road Trip 2010, led me to Houston to meet with the Marine Mom’s who have meant so much to me over the past several years. Terrie Pagel and Dianne Ladet were the leaders of the 3^rd LAR Yahoo Group that brought me in and connected me with other moms. I briefly met Dianne three years ago, but this was my first face to face meeting with Terrie. They were both a part of my everyday life prior to and during Adam’s deployment and have remained faithful friends ever since. In fact they were the first two people I talked to after being notified of Adam's death. They went through so much with me and I love them both dearly.

Another special mom I met with was Kay Gibson of the Houston Marine Moms. HMM is a large and organized group of Marine Moms. Their group sent Psalm 91 Bandanas to California to be passed out to 3^rd LAR’s deploying Marines in March of 2006. The Chaplain said "these are from a group of Houston Moms", as he handed the bandanas to the Marines just prior to boarding the bus. The Psalm 91 Bandana became a special part of Adam’s story. It was not until after his death, that I found the Houston Marine Moms, and specifically Kay, who were responsible for sending the bandanas that came to mean so much to me. Special bonds had been formed with special people. Their presence in my life means more than I can truly express. Without them, and many other special mom’s, Adam’s death would have been more difficult than it was.

My 1000 mile road trip ended back where it began, in Ft. Worth with the Hubbard’s. The week had been full of special reunions and first time meetings with people I had grown to love without ever having met them. In the death of a son, God had placed many people in my life to be a special blessing during those very difficult days, and always. God’s love and presence are made known in many ways. My Texas Road Trip was once again evidence of God’s love and provision in my life. In the terrible loss of a precious son, God did not leave me to face the pain alone. He sent special people to help lift me up and sustain me when I could not do it myself.

God loves each one of us so deeply and is there for us in good times and bad. He watches over every little detail for us for He sees the whole picture, He knows the beginning and the end. A click on a Yahoo groups page, as incidental as it may seem, was God setting in place the network of people I would need down the road. A soldier calling his Colonel from across the room and asking him to sit by us, a Marine Officer in Iraq who felt compelled to reach out to a mother who had lost her Marine son, are all evidence of God's love and provision. I have suffered great tragedy and have received great blessings. To my Texas friends who mean so much to me, thank you for allowing God to use you to honor my son, bless my life and remind me just how much He loves me.

Turning 25

2010-03-28T20:03:00.000-07:00

After taking an extremely long break, it’s time to jump in and get back to my heart’s desire, and that is writing. An update from a Gold Star Mom who lives a busy life, full of hard work, fun, family, friends, travel, politics, church and of course troop support projects! Life has moved forward in the fullest sense, however, this time of year causes me to pause and reflect. It’s hard not to feel the sadness as I realize my son a U.S. Marine who was killed in Iraq in 2006, would have been turning 25 years old on April 2^nd. I miss him everyday, but those special dates that come around still have a way of getting to me.

I last saw my son Adam when he was 20 years old. He, along with those from his Company boarded the white bus in 29 Palms and they left for their 7 month Iraq deployment. Since he would be turning 21 in less than a month, we had the good sense to throw him a big birthday bash on his last night at home, a few weeks before his departure. A BBQ at Camp Korean Village in Iraq, coincidently on the day of Adam’s 21^st birthday, served as a substitution for what should have been the “big” celebration.

In the days, months and even the first couple of years following his death, it was easy to think of Adam and what he looked like, how he would have responded in a given situation, things he might have said or might have done. But now as he would be turning 25, I’m losing the ability to picture the person he would be today. Surely the “young man” and sometimes almost “boyish” look would now be replaced with a more mature and manly look. Would he be married? Would he have children? Would he still be in the Marine Corps? If so, where would he be , where would he live? I don’t know the answers to those questions, and it hurts not to know what might have been. As I’ve watched Adam’s friends get married, start families, settled down and move forward, It hurts me that he has missed out on all that. In my heart and in my mind, Adam is still 20 years old.

There is loss on so many levels, but God remains faithful. He promises to never leave us or forsake us. Despite the terrible attack that took Adam’s life, at that moment Adam stepped into the arms of God and he is home safe and sound. Thankfully God doesn’t require us to be perfect, He just requires us to know His Son Jesus and accept the sacrifice He made as a substitution for our imperfections.

Years earlier, I knew there was a plan for Adam’s life. After the attack that almost took his life in Iraq, I knew for sure God had a plan to use Adam’s life, and Adam knew it to. Three weeks later the news of his death while devastating, was also in a way puzzling, because I knew God had a plan for Adam. It didn’t take long to see that God did indeed have a plan for Adam. A plan to use his life, and death, to reach others for Christ in a way that never would have been possible while he was alive.

As parents, our lives have been transformed and defined by the death of our son. Despite the tragedy, God has filled our lives with unimaginable blessings and opportunities to share Jesus with countless people. When the pain starts to take over I try to remember that God is using Adam for His purpose, in ways we never dreamed of. God does not leave us in those times of sadness and sorrow, but He holds us closer than ever and blesses us in ways we never thought possible.

Fox Company's Homecoming, A Night to Remember

2009-10-03T20:59:00.000-07:00

The wait was almost over. It had been nearly a year since they left their homes, their lives, their jobs and their loved ones for Iraq. Today, the men of Fox Company, 2nd Battalion 23rd Marines were arriving home.

Families eagerly gathered at the Reserve center in Salt Lake City from which the Marines were based. The local Marine Corps League served hamburgers and hot dogs, while families placed their welcome homes signs on the fence, chatted with one another, and nervously paced, while awaiting the arrival of their loved ones.

Meanwhile, about 25 miles to the south, the Patriot Guard Riders were staged and ready to assume escort duty of the returning Marines. The PGR are a group of motorcycle riders who often ride escort for military funerals. Whenever possible, they gladly ride in honor of those returning home from war.

When two large white buses transporting the Marines from Camp Pendleton in Southern California neared their location, the PRG prepared to ride. The Utah Highway Patrol with lights and sirens on, assumed the lead position, followed by the Marines, and the Patriot Guard bringing up the rear. The PGR had been instructed by UHP to block each freeway lane so traffic could not interfere with the procession.

Periodic updates on the Marine’s location raised excitement among the waiting families. One mother, Silvia Ellsworth showed obvious signs of nervousness and excitement. She could not seem to relax as she waited for her son to arrive.

The many months her son Randal had been in Iraq and in harm’s way had weighed heavy upon her. She received weekly emails and occasional phone calls from her son, but holding him in her arms was all she wanted.

The sirens from the escorting law enforcement drew closer. Then, they were there! Police motorcycles, two large white buses and about 25 Patriot Guard Riders pulled into Ft. Douglas and in front of the waiting families.

The Marines exited the buses and quickly went into the reserve center leaving the anxious family members watching, but unable to get that first hug until some brief duty was completed inside the center.

Families and friends, still anxiously waiting moved to the gym on the lower level of the building and waited. Finally, two Marines emerged from the office into the gym and the crowd erupted in cheers. The Marines descended the stairs into the arms of their loved ones. Then, they waited. After several minutes two more Marines made the same trek to loud cheers and clapping. Finally, LCpl. Ellsworth started down the stairs that led from the office to the gym floor. But he only made it part way before his mom Silva ran up the stairs and threw her arms around her son. After a warm and emotional embrace, Silvia wiped away tears of joy and they made their way down the stairs together, with the crowd still cheering.

The joy and excitement was felt by all who were there as each Marine reunited with their loved ones……. wives and children, fiancés, parents, siblings, grandparents and friends.

LCpl. Ellsworth talked about their mission in Iraq. He spent most of his time on a small outpost outside Ramadi where he built close friendships with the other Marines. While there, they helped train Iraqi security forces and provided humanitarian support for local Iraqis. When asked, he said “the heat about July and August was pretty bad”, as temperatures reach 140 degrees in Iraq. But LCpl. Ellsworth offered no complaints. The smile on his face seemed to make the hardships of the deployment fade away.

Even to an onlooker, the joy of the evening was contagious. The long separation from loved ones and the hardship of an Iraq deployment was over and all had returned.

I was happy to be part of this joyous evening and happy reunion, although I had been nervous about attending. I too am the mom of a Marine. I gave my son a last big hug and kiss as he boarded the bus and left for his Iraq deployment from California three years earlier. But I never experienced the joy of his homecoming like the families of Fox Company did that evening, as my son became a casualty of the Iraq war.

But for a brief moment, I allowed myself to imagine that it was my son walking down those stairs…. In my mind I saw the smile on his face, the twinkle in his eyes, the uniform he wore and the pack on his back. But I only indulged in that thought for a moment and realized just how happy I was to be celebrating the safe return of these Marines.

It had been a great afternoon and evening at Ft Douglas. For the Marines and families of Fox Company, life was good again.

LCpl.Randal Ellsworth

My Thoughts on "Taking Chance"

2009-02-25T21:48:00.000-08:00

I eagerly awaited the showing of the HBO movie “Taking Chance”. The movie depicted Mairne Pfc Chance Phelps' final journey home after being killed in Iraq. Lt. Col. Mike Strobl, Phelps' escort from Dover AFB back to his family in Wyoming, carefully recorded the events of this special duty. The story underscored the extreme dignity, honor and respect our fallen warriors are given every step of the way, from the battlefield to their final resting place.

First I want to say thank to you Pfc Phelps and his family for their service and sacrifice to our nation and to express my most heartfelt condolences. The final journey of Chance Phelps although tragic, was beautiful. It made me very proud.

My son Adam, like Chance, had also made that final trip home, with a Marine escort by his side after being killed in Iraq. As I watched the movie, I thought about my son and what that trip might have been like for him. Many things shown in the movie gave me new insight about my son's journey from Iraq, to Dover and finally home to Salt Lake City. I was especially moved by the way the bodies of our warriors are treated at Dover. The care and respect shown by each person at Dover surprised me, although it shouldn't have. I had no idea it was that way. My son's body was probably treated with a similar respect, and that comforts me.

The exceptional way a Marine escort cares for the Marine is awe-inspiring. At our request, my son was escorted home by his best friend, then LCpl. Robert Clark. Adam and Bobby grew up together, played baseball together and joined the Marines together, and Bobby brought Adam home. As I watched Lt. Col. Strobl in his escort duty, I realized just what it was we had asked Bobby to do, and how difficult that must have been for him. Just as Lt. Col. Strobl carried the small red velvet bag with Chance's personal effects from Dover and delivered them to his family, Bobby also carried a small red bag containing Adam's personal effects. I had never thought about how it had been Bobby's responsibility to carry that little bag with such care, and ensure it was safely placed in our hands. Truthfully, I don't know how Bobby ever got through that duty. I appreciate what he did for Adam more today, because of Chance Phelps' story.

Some of the same Marines from 2/23 Fox Company (-) who provided the funeral detail for Pfc. Phelps also helped lay my son to rest. For those who gave all and for the families left behind, the Marines truly do this job right. I thank them, and and am proud of them. Their compassionate professionalism comforted me.

This movie gave me understanding about the process and what it took to bring our son home. Despite spending the next few days in tears, I felt better knowing a little bit more about my son's final journey. I am grateful to Lt. Col. Strobl for volunteering to be Pfc. Phelps' escort and for his writings that eventually became this excellent movie. Lt. Col. Strobl, not only did you honor Pfc. Phelps and the Marine Corps, you provided a little more peace to another Marine mom who dearly misses her son. Thank you.

The Last Birthday

2009-02-10T13:27:00.000-08:00

Adam had been home on his predeployment leave and would be heading back to 29 Palms on February 10th, then to Iraq in early March. His 21st birthday on April 2nd would be spent in Iraq and that thought made me very sad. With only a few days remaining before his leave ended, I decided to throw Adam a birthday party. It was a little early but why not? As it turned out, it became one of the most fun and memorable birthdays, and it would also be his last birthday.

With only a few days to plan, we put together a nice family dinner and celebration along with gifts of course. For his deployment to Iraq we had ordered a KA-Bar knife, which he said wanted but didn't know we were getting. After all, a Marine needs his KA-Bar. But this was not just any knife, it was more like a small sword, with an eight inch fixed blade, but it was what he wanted. That worked out well, I didn't even have to stress over getting him a birthday present, the KA-Bar would do just fine. Only one problem, February 9th, the day of the birthday party came but the knife did not. Now what? So I had to move to plan B. This was a problem that could be easily solved with a trip to the dollar store and some imagination.

The birthday table was set in Adam's signature red – red everything. Red table cloth, red plates, cups, red wrapping paper, you name it and we did it red. The family all came, we had dinner with lots of laughs and stories. After the meal, blowing out the candles and eating birthday cake, it was time for gifts. Adam opened his presents one by one, and then it was time for his “big present” from mom and dad. Adam opened the box only to find a gray plastic sword with a bright orange handle. He laughed and smiled with those adorable dimples and got the biggest kick out of his new “weapon”. That was a happy evening and one I will always cherish.

The next day, just before Adam was to leave town to go back to 29 Palms, the KA-Bar arrived. Tony and I met up with him on his way out of town, in the Crown Burger parking lot, and exchanged the plastic sword with his coveted KA-Bar. We said our good-byes, he got in his car and drove away. It seemed so sad to see him go even though we knew we would see him in about three weeks in 29 Palms to see him off to Iraq. That was the last time we ever saw Adam here in Salt Lake City. So if you ever see me crying in my onion rings at Crown Burger, you'll know why.

Adam's 21st birthday on February 9th which wasn't his birthday at all, was one of the best!

Cpl. Adam Galvez, USMC
KIA 8/20/06 Iraq

My Tribute to President George W. Bush

2009-01-16T18:23:00.000-08:00

As the days count down to President Bush leaving office, a barrage of emotions have come over me that I did not expect. I knew it would be hard for me to see President Bush go, but these feelings caught me off guard. You see, the Bush presidency became very personal to me. It literally defined my life and changed it forever.

When President Bush took office in 2001, we were an average middle class family with three kids, then ages 12, 15 and 18. Life was hectic but nothing too out of the ordinary. President Bush instilled confidence in me. I felt like he had good insight and understanding and could get the job done. After 9/11 he demonstrated an ability and strength of character that made me believe he was the right man at the right time, and that America would be well served by him. I admired his determination and steadfastness to do what had to be done. I knew that President Bush was driven by his depth of character, his core values and beliefs, and his desire to always do what was best for America.

President Bush did not seem to care about scoring political points or making personal gains. That knowledge comforted me when my son Adam joined the Marine Corps in 2004. It was a fact that Adam would be going to war, but he would do so under a president who desired nothing more than to protect America. Knowing that, reassured me. My son would not be putting his life on the line as a pawn in someone's political game or to fulfill some ulterior motive of the powerful. No, my son and every other person who served, did so at the direction of a man who himself was a servant to the people.

On August 31, 2006 President Bush sat with my family and privately expressed his condolences for our son's death in Iraq. The sincerity of his heart was evident. Our son's death was personal to him too. This young American had gone into battle at his direction and had come home to his family in a casket. He grieved with us but remained steadfast in his duty to defend America. Although we had just buried our son, we held firm to our belief in the need to complete and win the war in Iraq. The future of the American way of life depended on it.

In addition to taking the fight to the terrorist and keeping it off our homeland, the U.S. presence in Iraq liberated 25million people, and helped form an oasis of emerging freedom and democracy in the a volatile middle east, which was necessary for our safety here at home.

The President's development of the department of Homeland Security and implementation of various programs to monitor, detect and thwart threats against America have worked. Since 9/11 no attacks on the homeland were able to come to fruition. The homeland had been kept safe.

The last eight years have brought good and bad. I won't say I have agreed with everything President Bush has done, but what he has done, he did out of a conviction to do the right thing for the people and for the country. He has acted with courage, honor and integrity throughout his eight years as our president.

To President Bush I say thank for serving our nation in such an honorable way. Thank you for recognizing the real threats we faced and for acting to preserve and protect our nation and it's people. Thank you for being a man of integrity and being willing to do the right thing regardless of the direction the political wind was blowing. You honored God, you honored our country and now Mr. President I honor you and thank you for a job well done.

Different Than It Used To Be, But Christmas Is Still Wonderful

2009-01-07T15:29:00.000-08:00

Whew, we made it through another Christmas! I not only made it through, but it was an especially wonderful Christmas this time around.

When the kids were younger Christmas was all about the tree, massive amounts of gifts, last minute shopping, late night Christmas Eve wrapping, and falling into bed about 2 AM after ensuring every detail was handled. Making sure my kids would have a great Christmas morning was all that mattered. Did I forget anything? Do the presents look just right under the tree? Will the kids like their stockings? Oh maybe I should not have bought this and should have bought that. Those were wonderful times and what I use as the standard to compare every Christmas with.

Now my oldest is 26 has a family of her own. My youngest is 20 and still lives at home, sort of. My middle child lies in a grave at the Veteran’s cemetery. Well, his body lies in a grave. I take great comfort in knowing he is now in Heaven and in the presence of the Lord. Since Adam’s death in Iraq, nothing has been the same, and most certainly Christmas has been different. We miss him every day but at Christmastime the loss is accentuated.

I don’t feel the same excitement about Christmas as I used to. We tend to blame the blahs about the holidays on Adam’s death. How could you enjoy Christmas in the same way when someone you love so much is gone? But the truth is, the lack of enthusiasm my not be entirely due to my son’s death. The hustle and bustle, mad dashes to get the right gift, decorating, Christmas baking and the excitement in the air are enhanced by the presence of children. Moms and Dads feed off the excitement of their children. They are the ones who make Christmas so special.

Now that the kids are grown and there are no children in the house, the deceleration of the Christmas whirlwind is probably a natural progression and not entirely attributed to a missing family member.

There reached a point following my son’s death where I had to quit longing for things to be normal again. My definition of normal was when “Adam was still alive.” I remember the moment my heart and eyes were opened to the concept of the “new normal” It was now normal that Adam would not be present at holiday gatherings, so longing for him to be there was doing myself and the rest of the family a disservice. I had to embrace what was now normal and be grateful for the blessings we had, because they were plentiful.

Just as life without one of my children led me to live in a new kind of normal, so has the “empty nest” syndrome. Life will never be the same as it was when the children were younger. We have grown into new phases of life where everything does not revolve around the kids. That is also a new kind of normal and very nice in many ways. Actually, it’s really nice in a lot of ways.

As I would most certainly be missing my son on Christmas, a special friend told me to “cherish the memories but remember that new memories are were yet to be made.” That bit of advice made me think about what kind of memories I wanted to have when I reflected on this Christmas.

As Christmas of 2008 went into the history books, I could say I had a truly wonderful Christmas and good memories had certainly been made. There were no tears, just a joyous day with those I love and anticipation of many good things to come in the new year .

The Christmas Gathering

2008-12-06T20:01:00.000-08:00

This is repost from 2007, I thought is was worth sharing again.

The temperature was in the mid twenties and snow covered the ground, as I passed houses adorned with Christmas lights I felt the sparkle of Christmas joy within me. In an unfamiliar neighborhood, I searched in the darkness for the home of a very special family. Upon entering, I felt like I had stepped into Christmas. This home of Austrian immigrants was beautifully decorated for Christmas, with platters of goodies all around and the faces of friends to greet me, I was feeling especially good.

This group of four couples all share a special bond. We had each been the recipient of the infamous knock on the door with two uniformed servicemen awaiting us on the other side. Yes, we were all the parents of sons who had been killed in combat in Iraq and Afghanistan.

There were no tears shed that evening. We told stories, laughed, reminisced, and ate lots of food. As the conversation turned to things of real importance, I felt a sense of awe as I realized the true patriots I sat among, their depth of character and true love not only for their families, but for their country.

As we spoke of our sons, as we usually do when we are together, not once did anyone say, “if only he hadn’t gone,” “why did my son have to die,” or “what are we fighting for.” Instead, we spoke of the awesome privilege it is to live in the United States of America, something most people simply take for granted. Bob Lehmiller, father of Sgt. Michael Lehmiller, killed in Afghanistan August 21, 2005, talked about previous wars and the enormous casualty rates they had suffered. We each acknowledged that the casualty rate in our current war is extremely low in light of the great accomplishments that have been made. It was mentioned at the start of the Iraq invasion, servicemen were told to expect 30,000 casualties in the first 30 days. Here we are at 41/2 years into the conflict with a casualty count of about 4,000. Although our personal losses are deep and painful, the overall cost in American lives has been extremely low.

It has become clear that for some of us, parents of sons killed in combat defending our liberties, we see this as a “special duty” we have been chosen for. Our sons paid the highest price possible and we who remain behind are now charged with the responsibility to carry on where they left off. There is so much to do. We have been called on first to be Americans who support our nation no matter the cost. Then we go out into our communities and help others recognize the need to step up and be participants of patriotism and not simply partakers. I am often amazed after finishing a care package project for the troops where dozens of people have volunteered their time, effort and money, to have someone come to me and say “thank you for letting me help.” You see their excitement knowing they have a made a difference in the lives of American servicemen on the other side of the world. They don’t keep their excitement to themselves, they share it with others and their patriotism shows just a bit brighter.

The Lehmillers travel to events across the nation in their truck decked out in camouflage, a Purple Heart and tributes to our military, promoting Operation Salute which supports servicemen and their families in times of need. You’ll find many families of the fallen involved in projects and organizations that are making a difference for our servicemen and our nation. I have found that those who have lost the most seem to have the most to give.

As I started for home that evening, I felt joy and peace in my heart knowing I am part of a very special group of people. Although we miss our sons terribly and feel thier loss every moment of the day, we are proud parents who are honored to serve our nation.

Lt. Andrew Kinard, An Amazing Marine

2008-12-05T22:45:00.001-08:00

Lt. Andrew Kinard is an amazing Marine. Back in October of 2006 Lt. Kinard was with 2nd LAR, the unit that had just replaced my son's unit in Rawah, Iraq. Following 2nd LAR's progress in Rawah seemed to help me feel connected to my son Adam, who had been killed in that same town only a few months before. Knowing what was happening there made me feel better somehow. Maybe because that is where my son spent the last days of his life. A piece of my heart was still in Rawah.

Lt. Kinard suffered devastating injures on Oct. 29, 2006 when he was struck by an IED. I have kept up on his progress over the last few years and have been touched by his humble and gracious attitude. He knows God is working in his life and has given him some very special duty. I was honored to meet Lt. Kinard earlier this year. We met simply by chance. I had met one of my heroes.
Read Lt. Kinard's story.

Marine Awarded Silver Star

2008-12-01T08:54:00.000-08:00

Moses Cardenas
On one hot August morning near Rawah, Iraq, Lance Corporal Moses Cardenas of the Marines 1st Light Armored Reconnaissance Battalion found his platoon barraged by an insurgent suicide bomb, numerous rocket-propelled grenades, and heavy machine gun fire. In the chaotic moments that followed, Cardenas would have to decide between attempting the rescue of his wounded sergeant or remain in his covered position until reinforcements arrived. The choice was simple.
Cardenas thought, "He was my sergeant; I had to do something," and with that he courageously charged 50 meters through the kill-zone to his wounded comrade. Running the gauntlet through enemy fire, he was shot in the neck by the spray of weapons’ fire. Undeterred, he arrived at Sgt. Randy Roedema’s exposed position and performed first-aid to stop the flow of blood from Roedema’s severe wounds.
With both Marines wounded and under the sights of numerous insurgents, Cardenas knew if he was to save his friend he must evacuate both of them to safety. With his M249 Squad Automatic Weapon charged and a grip on his injured sergeant, Cardenas rotated between firing his machine gun and pulling Roedema across the battlefield. Reaching the relative safety of his platoon’s convoy, Cardenas continued laying down suppressive fire until the situation came under control and medics could tend to the wounded Marines.
Cardenas was awarded the Silver Star, the third highest military award. Roedema would later reflect "I owe him my life." Four days after Cardenas saved his life, Roedema’s wife gave birth to their first child – a child that will have a father because of the selfless act preformed by Cardenas on that summer morning in Iraq

Close Guantanamo?

2008-11-17T20:34:00.000-08:00

With the approaching inauguration of President-Elect Obama there is increasing talk of closing Guantanamo Bay. As a military mom, nothing riles me more than that topic. So Guantanamo is closed, what then? Do we simply let the detainees go or do we bring them back to the U.S. for “trial?”

Men who were captured on the battlefield probably didn’t get their Miranda rights read to them, which means in a U.S. criminal trial, they win. They probably didn’t have access to high powered attorneys during their stay at Guantanamo, so I guess that means, they win again. The media would be falling all over themselves playing the angle of the poor detainees who were denied "their rights” and suffered greatly under the Bush Administration. There would be an outpouring of sympathy for the enemy. Day in and day out, the media would bring the plight of the detainees before us and make us feel guilty for their "mistreatment."

To most of us that sounds ridiculous but I bet that’s exactly how it would play out. How could anyone in their right mind possibly consider bringing some of America’s worst enemy combatants, those who have murdered our servicemen, to the U.S. for a criminal trial? If we bring them here and are unsuccessful at prosecuting them, would that mean we held them illegally for the past 5 years? Do we then become liable to compensate them for the "injustice" they suffered at our hands? Sounds absurd? No not really.

Maybe we should just send them home. But what happens then? They are free to pick up arms and resume their calling, to kill the infidel and in case we have forgotten, that's us, that's our soldiers, that's our families. We must be insane if we think the bad guys will go home and suddenly feel remorse and grow a conscience. Or perhaps we’ll think they learned their lesson and will be nice to us now.

I take granting any kind of lenience to these men as a direct a assault against all America's service men and women and their families. Do we have so little understanding of all they have done and all they have endured, that we would side with the enemy and disregard and soldier?

Only those who are the very worst enemies of the U.S. still remain at Guantanamo. We sure don’t need to be extending them American rights, and we most certainly don’t need our own government replenishing the battlefield with ruthless killers. Maybe some decisions just shouldn’t be made by politicians. But this is just one mom's opinion.

Marine Corps Birthday Ball

2008-11-10T19:15:00.000-08:00

November 10th marked the 233rd birthday of the United States Marine Corps. Five years ago on November 10th as I made my evening commute listening to the radio, I hung on every word as the history of the Corps was described in great detail by the radio host. I was moved by what I heard and somewhat ashamed that much of what I learned was new to me. I felt a connection in some strange way. The host went on to talk about the time honored tradition of Marines celebrating the birthday of the Corps, the gathering (now the Marine Corps Ball) and the ceremonial cake cutting recognizing the oldest and youngest Marines in attendance. When the radio show ended, I remember feeling sad because I wanted to hear more.

The following year my son Adam joined the Marines. He seemed to find his niche in life and became part of a very special family. As he prepared for his first Birthday Ball, the excitement was contagious. Who would think a “Ball” would be so important to a 20 year old, or at least my 20 year old? After months of planning and anticipation, my heart broke as his date stood him up. We later heard he had a great time anyway but it was heart breaking none the less, especially since it would be Adam's only Ball.

Last Saturday, my husband and I attended our fourth Marine Corps Birthday Ball. When our son was killed in Iraq, we inherited his “family,” the Marine Corps. Marines take care of their own. Adam was one of theirs. When he died, they made us theirs as well.

Parents of Marines rarely become part of the Marine Corps family in the way we have. The Marines have watched over us, cared for us and loved us, and by doing so, they have honored our son.

Today November 10, 2008 the 233rd birthday of the Marine Corps, I visited Adam's grave, and there I found a piece of birthday cake from the Ball and a pair of white gloves placed lovingly on his headstone. His family had not forgotten him.

A Little Humor Makes A Great Point

2008-11-08T08:06:00.000-08:00

Anticipating a sweeping Democratic Party victory in the November elections, animals that were formerly self-sufficient are already modifying their behavior to take advantage of what they expect to be a new set of societal norms in the next four to eight years. This black bear from Montana has ceased hunting for a living and is sitting outside the US Fish & Wildlife Service office in Kalispell, apparently waiting to be fed and to have his winter den dug by government employees. The residents of Kalispell are calling him "Bearack Obama".

Did We Really Ask For Change?

2008-11-05T17:01:00.000-08:00

American’s spoke and said they wanted change. Yesterday Senator Barack Obama became President Elect Obama. Change is what America asked for and change is what we’ll get.

We’ve had the lowest unemployment rates in decades and the highest economic growth, But we want change. Somehow with the sub prime mortgage crisis, we have been able to overlook the last seven years of unprecedented prosperity.

We have not had an attack on our home land since September 11, 2001. Why? Because we fought back. We took the fight to the enemy and have kept it off our home land. We can now more easily track those who seek to destroy us. But we want change. I am sick and tired of hearing how we are violating the rights of the terrorist. I’m sure we’ll see an expanded “terrorist bill of rights” coming soon.

With a laundry list of change to come; higher taxes and punishing the successful, increased restrictions on energy production, more government requirements on employers, decreased public access to fire arms, increased government subsidies - encouraging more of the population to become less productive, a plan to sit down and talk to our enemies despite the fact they have already stated their intentions, limiting voices with views opposing the government under the guise of fairness, and it goes on and on, I'd say change is in store.

Does anyone find it interesting that parties and celebrations were held all over Europe at the announcement of Obama’s win? Does he want to be the world’s President or ours? .

America has a value system and foundation that has set it apart from the rest of the world. Our laundry list of change seems to be patterned after socialist European nations. Is this really the change we want?

Our freedom and all that makes America great must be protected. My concern is once we start down this road we probably will never find our way back. The America our forefathers established and the way of life most American’s cherish, once abandoned will never again be known. That most certainly will be change.

Worthy and Willing to Preserve All You Have Fought To Defend

2008-11-02T18:19:00.000-08:00

As a conservative Christian and the mom of a young man who gave his life defending America, I take the election of a new President very seriously. Maybe it’s just more personal to me since my son gave his all for this nation.

We are very blessed to live in the United States of America. I firmly believe that God inspired our forefathers who then set forth the blueprint of what would become the freest, most generous, good and prosperous nation on earth.

As the years have passed many of the foundations on which America was built, have eroded away. It happens little by little. If you look back to where we started and where we are now, the changes are enormous. We were founded on principles where life was valued, hard work was rewarded, and our freedom would not be compromised. Today it is as if the very government that was established to work for the people, is becoming the people’s biggest oppressor.

We all have different views, but my hope and prayer is that the President we send to Washington in January will be one who is determined to hold on to the ideals which birthed this nation and made it great.

What an honor it must be to be named Commander-in-Chief. I hope the person we elect will be equally humbled at the huge responsibility and duty we are entrusting him with. Many of you reading this have worn the uniform and fought for our country and I am deeply grateful to you all. May the next President of the United States be a man who is worthy and willing to preserve all you, and those who have gone before you, have fought to defend.

Cpl.Garrett S. Jones A True American Hero

2008-11-01T16:16:00.000-07:00

Article and photos by Sgt. Ray Lewis
Task Force 2d Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division, Special Purpose Marine Air Ground Task Force

CAMP BARBER, Helmand Province, Afghanistan – There was blood in the water. It was a grim addition to the Iraqi sewage canal usually littered with dead sheep and festering fish.That’s where the Marines of Company E, 2d Battalion, 7th Marine Regiment, 1st Marine Division found their comrade after the attack.Just seconds before, Cpl. Garrett S. Jones was patrolling the streets of Iraq with his team when he was suddenly hurled 15 feet into the air by an enemy booby trap.“It was just a big dust cloud,” said Cpl. Robert C. Pofahl, who stood 10 feet in front of Jones when the bomb detonated. “I ran toward him, and I fell in the canal. The mud was almost up to my knees. It was probably the worst smell you could smell. That’s when I saw the blood in the water.”When Pofahl saw Jones lying there, he feared his friend’s life was cut short. Barely alive, Jones’ life was about to be changed forever. Read more.

Satisfaction In Knowing They've Made A Difference

2008-10-27T20:32:00.000-07:00

The story that follows caught my attention and truly warmed my heart. Why? Because they made a difference. This is the city where my son died at the hands of insurgents. In August of 2006, the city of Rawah, Iraq was about at it's worst. Adam's Marine unit had just taken the area over from the Army which had been moved to Baghdad. Later Adam's Captain told us when they read the intelligence on Rawah (where their unit would be moving) "we all knew it was bad news." In a three week period Delta Company lost six Marines and a Navy Corpsman, in two large attacks.

Having heard the stories of how bad Rawah was then, and now hearing how the city has rebounded, chased out the enemy and returned to a "normal" life, gives me a deep sense of satisfaction. You see, a piece of my heart is still in Rawah, that's where my son's life ended. Because Adam was there, and because of what the Marines have done in Rawah over the past two years, we read stories like this one..... What's this I hear about "the war is not winnable?"

'Friendship City' Kicks Off Partnership

Tuesday, 14 October 2008
By Lance Cpl. Joshua MurrayRegimental Combat Team 5

An Iraqi girl holds books and school supplies donated to the Al Moaine elementary school in Rawah, Iraq, Oct. 6, 2008. Marines with Fox Company, Task Force 2nd Battalion, 2nd Marine Regiment, Regimental Combat Team 5 dropped off the first donation sent to the children of Rawah by citizens of Towamencin, Pa., which is the 'Friendship City' for Rawah. Photo by Lance Cpl. Joshua Murray.

RAWAH — Children at the Al Moaine elementary school scampered down to the entrance to meet the Marines who were visiting to drop off special gifts. They followed the cardboard boxes with their eyes entranced as Marines unloaded them into the schoolyard.
Marines with Fox Company, Task Force 2nd Battalion, 2nd Marine Regiment, Regimental Combat Team 5 dropped off the first donation sent to the children by citizens of Towamencin, Pa., which is the "Friendship City" for Rawah.

According to www.towamencin.org, the "Friendship City" program traces its roots to the "People-to-People" program that was inaugurated by the President of the United States in 1956 to establish greater friendship and understanding between the people of the United States and other nations.
The plan to become a "Friendship City" was lead by the mother and father of Capt. Aaron Schwartz, the company commander of Fox Co., who reside in Towamencin. Schwartz’s parents coordinated the program with their son to show support for Rawah’s citizens.
"Thank you so much for this visit to our schools," said Adam Hamed Ghthayan, the director of education for the city, to the Marines. "We will hand out everything brought to different schools in Rawah."

The boxes of donated goods contained everything needed to kick off a soccer season, including soccer uniforms in multiple colors. The Marines also brought other donated goods, such as books and writing materials to help the students begin the new school year. "Funding to get these children properly equipped with the things they need for school is a big problem," said Ghthayan. "Without the supplies they need for school, the quality of their education and their lives are deeply affected."

Once Marines opened the boxes and began distributing the gifts, hundreds of children swarmed to the source. Little hands rose up over the crowd and the sound of "mister, mister please," echoed through the schoolyard. The youngsters gasped in surprise and thanks over pencils, pens and books; items that are usually commonplace in the U.S.

"This is all about the children," said Ghthayan. "Schools have improved so much since 2003. We are looking forward to continuing our work with our friendship city." Schwartz assured the people of Rawah that the relationship between the two cities would continue over the years.

"This is just the first shipment of items from your ‘Friendship City,’" said Schwartz, 31, originally from Hatfield, Pa., to the people of Rawah. "[The people of Towamencin] will continue to send things and they are working on getting an Arabic speaker so they can talk to you directly."

CHOSEN FOR A VERY SPECIAL DUTY

2008-10-25T12:07:00.001-07:00

On August 20, 2006 my life changed forever. With a visit to Utah from President Bush scheduled in ten days, I was busy sending out emails to encourage people to turn out for a rally to support the troops and our Commander-In-Chief. Seems easy enough, but with Salt Lake City’s mayor Rocky Anderson leading a protest against the President and the war, aided by anti-war, anti-military activist Cindy Sheehan, we had work to do. As it turned out I was the one who would not be present to show my support because in ten days I would be attending my son’s funeral.

As I diligently tried to organize support for the upcoming rally, the Marines at Fort Douglas in Salt Lake City were preparing to pay me a visit. Earlier that day word reached Fox Company that a local Marine had been killed by an IED in Iraq. Now, two casualty officers were on their way to my house. Having hit every website, email group and contact I had that would be supportive of the rally, I was still busy typing when I heard a car door close out front. Without even thinking I reached over to the blinds and peeked through the slats only to see two Marines crossing the street approaching my house. A military mom knows exactly what that means, they don’t have to say a word, you already know.

My son, Marine Cpl. Adam Galvez was with 3rd LAR and had been in Iraq since early March of 2006. We communicated with him often and he was doing well. On July 29, 2006 Adam narrowly escaped death when a suicide bomber detonated a truck laden with explosives outside a building he was in. Four Marines did not survive that attack. After recovering from his injuries and rejecting the offer to come home, Adam returned to camp to resume his duties. On August 20, 2006 in the city of Rawah, a convoy of four Light Armored Vehicles (LAV) started out across town. They left the road to access a knoll from which they could survey the area. The first LAV drove on, the second, the third, then the forth drove across the pressure plate which detonated an IED consisting of multiple artillery shells and a fuel accelerant. They said it was a huge explosion. Miraculously, three of the six man crew survived, the others did not.

A few days later as I sat in my living room with news cameras and reporters, I pleaded with our community to turn out to the rally and show their support for our military men and women who were fighting for us in Iraq. We had to counter the voices that were telling the rest of the world that the U.S. military was killing civilians and destroying Iraqi homes and villages. Unbelievably, these accusations were being spewed by our own government officials and repeated by the media and millions of others who had decided the Americans were the bad guys. The problem is, their words didn’t just play to an American audience. It was repeated world wide and right to the very people who were killing American servicemen, our sons, husbands, fathers…. Yes our own officials as well as American citizens had unwittingly become cheerleaders for the enemy.

August 31st, the day after we buried our son, President Bush sat and visited with our family, my husband and me and our two adult children. It was surreal as we found ourselves discussing world events with the President of the United States, but that was in fact what we were doing. His kindness and sincerity confirmed to me that he made decisions he believed were in the best interest of the United States. There was no personal or political gain, no game playing, just deep beliefs and convictions - there had been no other option. I told the President, the thing that would hurt me the most would be if he brought the troops home before they finish the job. He assured me as long as he was President that would not happen. It is important to me that my son’s death counts, and that it was not wasted.

So much has happened over the last two years, but my beliefs have not changed. I still believe that America must win the war in Iraq and despite the outcry from many to quit because "the war is not winnable," our troops are succeeding. It is becoming more apparent that the hard work and sacrifices have indeed counted. We must have a stable middle east where democracy is alive and well, because that is in America’s best interest. I still believe that we live in a world where evil is present and is set on destroying what is good, yes evil wants to destroy us – America. You don’t have to assume or guess, the radical Islamic extremists have said as much, but somehow in the eyes of some, we’re still the bad guys. Too much is at stake to stand on the sidelines. Yes I have worked in the background, led troop support projects, been part of local and national organizations that promote patriotism and support the military, but I want to do more. As a Gold Star mother I almost feel like I have been chosen for a very special duty. My son has been silenced but I have not. I will carry on where he left off. I won’t face an enemy on the battlefield, but I will work here on the home front supporting our military, getting involved in important issues, and doing all I can to preserve this great nation, the nation for which my son gave his life.

In the weeks that follow, I will share some of my stories and experiences as well as observations on current events -through the eyes of a Gold Star mom.